my parents never gave me the sex talk and here i am knowing more than i should
(Source: officialsubway)
“how to get annoyed at absolutely nothing” a book written by me
featuring: your period
(Source: syardis)
when i exercise i feel fatter than before i started
school has just taught me so many helpful life lessons
like i don’t know what a mortgage is or how it works or what a tax refund is and how you even do taxes
but i know how to graph an imaginary number on a coordinate plane
(Source: goodbyeforeverfatty)
do you guys find me as funny as i find myself
i find myself hilarious
i usually laugh at my own jokes for 34 minutes
are you the SAT because i’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes
i don’t even gain followers anymore i just hang around
(Source: nointerrruption)






